about friendship

when we get back to yours and i tell you to do whatever you like, you anyway say you want to stay with me. i'm feeling really happy about that; I've missed you. it is perfect to fall asleep next to you, to feel the warmth of the person I trust for more than 100%. You hug me and say that you really care about me. I don't want the morning to come, don't want you to leave and to see you again just in half a year ish. But it comes. We're standing outside, you hug me and say that we will meet soon. You turn around to go but suddenly come back and hug me again. And then; then you say that special three words and the sun is shining that strong that you start disappearing in that light. And I feel how sadness is filling my body and what can I say - i love you too and you are still one of my best friends

the beginning of my birthday will be sleepless, hah, as always. tonight feels strange, I'm listening to gospel music and can't believe I'll see my parents tomorrow(which is the best gift of all). Just one thing - I wish I had some of my friends to share my 18th tomorrow.

I thought I don't like birthdays but now i realize it's the time when people remember you, even the ones who you would think have already forgotten about you.

Anyways, lets see what happens tomorrow, I bet it will be amazing.

x

sleepless nights and 'you really make me laugh, you could really talk for England!'

i'm really missing my family. 2 days to go

'no'

it always hurts saying 'no' to people who fall for you. it always happens and it kills me, because it kills the others. you said things what just few people are able to say, something what always makes me think and become stronger and i wish i liked you really, because you are a good guy. i'm so sorry